“I have never felt so lonely in my life.”
I thought about it three days ago while resting my eyes in the middle of my writing project. I felt it was a long and tedious day. I wasn’t effective (in writing with zeal and passion) compared a few weeks ago.
What just happened?
I was sitting on my bed thinking of what I’ve gotten myself into. Do I really have to endure these? I felt miserable because the thought of it frustrates me.
How much do I really want to pursue my dream? My calling? My purposeful life? Questions were running in my mind, believing that Providence would answer them, one way or the other.
I was on the verge of quitting. Maybe it’s time to look for another career. Maybe it’s time to stop working, pursue Bible school (again), go out of the country for missions, and forget about this writing stuff. list of sites . It’s all fluff.
I wanted to quit. I can’t stand being alone. I should have been somewhere out there, mingling, traveling, being merry, and enjoying life at its finest, but I know there was more to life than those things—it’s something beyond the natural senses, something sublime.
I waited. I listened to His silence and wrestled with Resistance.
Then it dawned on me how fortunate I am, for who I am, where I am, and what I am right now. Tears started rolling down my cheeks. I realized I was blinded by the situation, and until I accepted that I was at my weakest, I understood it was part of the journey. It’s like seeing myself in the mirror, once again, but with clarity and better understanding of who I am as a writer and as a woman.
These are part of becoming one, more than just “to be one.”
I wrote my thoughts that night in my journal:
I learned three things over the course of three days while working at home. They are part of the process and the journey itself.
- Overcome yourself
- Remember your WHY
- Endure as long as you can
As I type these words, I’ve never felt so fulfilled in my life. It’s like being broken again into pieces. I felt good. Setting aside all the things I’ve learned from the past and looking forward to new things every day.
I am on my way to the road of breakthrough. It’s making me a better, wiser, and tougher not only a writer but also a woman with such strength of character.
Personally, writing is the loneliest profession. http://settewriter.com/the-loneliest-profession-ever/I need to be alone, sit down, and start crafting sentences with these tools: words
Every day. Yes. Every day you must do it.
“On writing – It was hard and lonely, and the words seldom just flowed.” – William Zinsser
There’s no other way to become better and wiser, but to experience the process and as you go through it, there’s growth, and such continuity of growth comes maturity.
Writing is the loneliest profession, but it is also the most fulfilling profession ever because each day you learn new things from the craft itself.
I’m glad I experienced this because if I didn’t, I’m the same certified procrastinator just like before.
How about you? How’s your life as a professional writer?
[Photo credit: Deposit Photos]